Joe Stains

This is the blog of an angry old boston terrier. (and his little brother Tanner who gets to post every Tuesday)

Thursday, May 29, 2008


Guys, its been non stop around here since my Aunt got here. I don't have too much time to update, and again, I am sorry I cannot visit blogs but here is some of what has been going on.

My cousin who is part poodle is pretty great, she pets me a lot and says nice things.

I let my Aunt and my Uncle sit on my couch for a while. They were awaiting instruction on what I might like to do next in this photo.

My uncle bought something called a Wii? I have no idea what this thing is but the kids wave their arms around and jump up and down and yell. Kids are weird.

Even Tanner is like WTF dudes?

Tonight the kids and my aunt are staying at the resort where my uncle works. Today they went up on the roof!

Cool huh?!

Dad and the kids went swimming, I am kind of glad I didn't have to go to that, I really hate the water!

But it sure looks nice!

Tomorrow is my Mom's birthday and I heard something about CAKE. I am going to go get some rest so I am ready to talk one of the human pups into sharing with me!

Tuesday, May 27, 2008

Stain AWARD! Rattling brain!

WHATSSSSSSSSSSSUUUUUUUUUUUUUUPPPPPPPPPP guys! It is Tanner TUesday again already. I'd like to say FIRST that our friend Ike nominated our other friend Huskee to receive the STAIN AWARD!!! I went to see his blog and this is what Huskee said!!!

"I peed a HUGE puddle on the big bed at 11pm and the hoomans had to wash the bedsheet and mattress protector in the middle of the night. They also had no mattress to sleep on that night as we had to air the wet patch. *whew.. it sure feels so much better after I have confessed*..."

OMDOG you TOTALLY deserve the stain award for THAT!? GOOD JOB!??!!!!!!!!! Please accept this award from both JOEY and ME!

stain award

So yesterday we went to that skating party and had SO MUCH FUN. I fell a LOT like a million billion zillion times. I got home and said to Joey, Hey Buds, Hey Buds, Hey Buds...

I think my brain is loose...

If I shake my head REAL FAST LIKE THIS...

I thinks I hear my brain rattling??!?! he said, "then don't do that". OMDOG he is so freakin SMART! Seriously, what would I do without that dude!!!

Could you see me???

OMDOG our yard is like a JUNGLE! We are cutting it tonight because tomorrow our Aunt Michelle and her three human pups get here!!!!!!!!!! We are SO excitered! OMDOG!! We will TRY to do some updating and visiting of blogs, I promise!!!! Joey said if something happens and we need to send good doggy vibes to someone, leave us a comment PLEASE!!!!!!!

Monday, May 26, 2008

Skate Town, we are SO there!!

Today we are atOpal and Pearl's skating party!!! We love to skate and can't wait to hang with our wheely friends. Tanner wanted to take his skateboard but with Mom being crazy about this wedding and people coming to visit, I thought she would be happier if I got him into something a little safer.

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I think he will be ok, but he is the Doofus so I will have to keep my eye on him.

Don't worry about me, back in the day I was somewhat of a skating phenomena.

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I hope you all have a great Memorial Day, grill some goodies and relax!!

Sunday, May 25, 2008

Mom has lost it

I want to thank you all for the kind words of encouragement for my loony Mom. I think this whole wedding thing has got her a little bit crazy. Last night she had a dream that they got married but then the guy who was driving their license to the recorder's office got in a car accident and the license was destroyed! Talk about losing it! She started feeling a lot better yesterday when the mailman came and brought her a WONDERFUL gift card from Peanut's family and that includes Grammie and her crew of dogs. It was a gift card for Mom's favorite spice store and she was almost crying when she read the card! Thank you guys so so much for the gift for her wedding, it came at a perfect time. She spent an hour reading the catalog to see how to spend her gift card!

Tanner thought that a great way to add excitement to the blog would be to play dress up.

He put on his Mickey Mouse shirt that he got from Princess Snowball.

Are you KIDDING me?! I really don't like dressing up at all.

But then Tanner said that Mom bought some bananananananas the other day so if I dressed up I would probably get some.

Plus this shirt is not so bad. I mean, if you have to wear a shirt it should at least speak the truth. It may be hard to read but it says, Tiny Dog, Huge Attitude.

Tanner likes that shirt because it hides his incredible bulk.

Sure enough, we got our reward. Sorry for the blurry photo but at this point I am crashing into Mom's leg demanding that delicious banananananna. Look at the price of that! Mom gets them on the clearance cart because we sure don't care if they are a little bit too ripe!! YUM! Lots of doggies said they really love seeing the food pics on the blog, so I am going to leave you guys with one that will keep you drooling...

Mom made this pizza was YUMTASTIC!!!!!!!!!!!! Mom has her own blog for food if you want to check it out! Thank you again for all the kind words. This wedding better hurry up and get over or Mom might end up starting a THIRD blog or something equally insane.

Have a great Memorial Day guys!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Saturday, May 24, 2008

Are you bored?

Mom keeps thinking my blog is getting boring. Do people really just want to look at photos of me being handsome all the time??

We had a talk about it last night. Tanner was just sleeping, he never helps with anything.

What do you guys think?? Am I getting boring?

We have a long weekend to think about it, so let me know what I can do to spice things up around here. I have obviously even bored the Doofus to sleep! Mom's sister and her human pups will be here Wednesday, so I will not be visiting many blogs for about a week, but I will try to update. Hopefully those posts will be more exciting!

Thursday, May 22, 2008

Thanner Thursday!!!

Right NOW it is storming outside!! So Joey is hiding so I said I will do one post while he is being scared pants!!!!!

I would like to show you some things OK?

This thing is called Grammy's Pot Pie. It is SO GOOD to eat!! We get some sometimes in our dry food and it makes the besterest dinner!

But we still get that STUPID powder, LESS POWDER MORE FOOD! !!! !!!

Mom makes us eat a million miles apart because sometimes I get done first and then I try to eat some of Joe's food too. That is not my fault he is OLD and SLOW!!!

Also, we got these things. Its a bunch of fish in that bag but they dried them up into snackies! Thye are SO OO OOO good. Mom said they are STINKY but I LOVE them! They make our furs soft and shiny!!

ALSO my big corn shank is missing. Joes thinks its just lost, but it might be somewhere Startegic so I can find it and use it sometimes, maybe! But reallly maybe I just wanted a new one!!!

We have a bazillons of these in the cupboard thanks to our Uncle Dick. he mailed me a BUNCH!

I gotta get to work on making this one into a SHANK!

Joe looks like he is trying to brush his teeths with it!!!! What a DORK!?!?!?!! LOL


This one happened the other night, Joey came in and laid RIGHT NEXT TO ME! We were bestest friends for like 10 minutes!!!!! OMDOG it was great! Then he got mad and left.

Tomorrow is a Friday and then the Mom and Dad don't have to go to that work on Monday becuase it is Memoriole Day. I guess that is a day to remember Orioles?? I didn't know they left but I guess they did if we have to remember them now??? I dunno, I will ask Joey, he knows everything! I hope you all have a good day remembering the Orioles!!!!!!!

Wednesday, May 21, 2008

An award to give and an award to receive!

So as you may know I gave out the first ever Stain Award not too long ago to my buddy Ike. Well, I have been inspired to give out the 2nd Stain award to my friends Deefor and Arrow. Deefor does not actually make any stains, but he deserves part of the award for putting up with his little menace Arrow. Arrow LOVES to pee in the house. His humans put down pee pads but still he pees on the carpet. GREAT job Arrow, you know the true meaning of stain perseverance!

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Even with all of those pads he still manages to make stains!!!!

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AND he does stuff like this to show the humans who the stain master is! GREAT job! I present you with the STAIN AWARD! Display it proudly and keep up the good work!

stain award

I got an award recently as well. My new friend Candi the Cavalier gave this award just for being her friend! How cool is that! Thanks Candi!!

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Finally, I leave you with another video. This one is instructional. It shows your humans what you should be doing this coming Saturday. I am posting it now so they have plenty of time to prepare and have the treats on hand!

Saturday is for chewies! from Rhonda on Vimeo.

Tuesday, May 20, 2008

Hey Dudes, its TUESDAY!

Today is TUESDAY. Lots of new readers may not know but on Tuesday I get to post. I am Tanner, I am Joe Stains brother! So Mom got this new flashing box and it is always in my face. I learned from those Army of Four Sibrarians that you should not be so good for the flashing box. They know because they are part siblings and part librarians!!! That means they are VERY smart!!!!!

SO MOm give us this new treat and its like a spinning rawhide and then some delicious meat tube. Its from the company Merrick!

I say, ok here you go Mom this picture I will be SO HAPPY about this great treat ok??

Then this one I will be not so good and pretend like I am trying to SHOVE this treat up my nose!!!!!

Then I will be like, I AM TANNER ZOMBIE....BRAINS BRAAAAINNNSS!! LOL I love those Zombie movies they showed on HBO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

What do you think, did I do ok on the learning how to not pose good for pictures?!?!?!!!

Monday, May 19, 2008

Tag and boy is it HOT!

The Army of Four tagged us for a fun game about spelling our name in Japanese!

simply spell out your name using the following key:

A - ka, B - tu, C - mi, D -te, E - ku, F - lu, G - ji, H - ri, I - ki, J - zu, K - me, L - ta, M - rin, N - to, O - mo, P - no, Q - ke, R - shi, S - ari, T - chi, U - do, V - ru, W - mei, X - na, Y - fu, Z - zi.

So Joey would be = ZuMoKuFu, sounds impressive and intimidating if you ask me!!

Tanner is = ChiKaToToKuShi, his sounds naughty, like an HBO word!!!

Thanks for tagging us, that was fun. We can never keep up with who has been tagged, so if you want to do this, go ahead.

I have also received word that Mango is still in one piece, and that the stuff in our fridge is a tasty fruit. I will go demand some right after I finish this blog! I was a little worried for a minute!

It is getting hot here again...

That is what it was at 8:30 the other night. Today it is supposed to be around 110 degrees! YIKES!!

It is a good thing we got our sunning in over the weekend.

I think we will be staying inside today!!!

Sunday, May 18, 2008

Flashing lights....

So we managed to get away from the camera long enough to get to Australia for the big party, but we were pooped so Tanner flew us home for a rest. We are very glad to be home but we will continue partying, don't worry, its convenient having my own flying service with the doofus. I just wanted to go to bed, but Mom had other ideas...

She wanted to change the sheets! The nerve of that woman! I am trying to rest here!!! I was NOT amused!

Then Tanner yelled from the TV room that there were dogs at the baseball game?! WHAT?! Sure enough, he was right for once! The Atlanta Braves allowed people to bring their dogs to the game!!!!! Why don't the Dbacks do this?!?!!!

OMDOG, that dog is getting a HOT DOG at the game. I need to write a letter to the Dbacks right away.

Just when I thought the day could not get any worse, I found this!

My relentlessly huge friend Mango has been chopped up and sold at our local grocer's. This is terrifying!?

I am going to go hide in my sleeping bag, I don't care if it is 104 degrees outside!!

Model behavior

So its been non-stop picture taking around here since last night. This camera is much faster so we end up with a lot more pics like this:

good lord look at that mess up.

It also has neat features so you get totally handsome photos like this:

I guess this new camera is not SO bad, since it lets me share my utterly handsome self with the dog blogging world. I hope everyone is having a great weekend!

Friday, May 16, 2008

Oh geez....

Mom got a new camera for her birthday, which is TWO WEEKS away. What does she think this is, MommyPalooza??? As if she was not annoying enough already!

She got a Canon S5 Powershot and she loves it!

The DOOFUS face
Perfect for capturing Doofus Faces

And super handsome pics of me!!!

Have a great weekend!!!!!!!!