Joe Stains

This is the blog of an angry old boston terrier. (and his little brother Tanner who gets to post every Tuesday)

Wednesday, June 27, 2007

step off I'm doing the hump

So I hope you are all entering Jackson's Moustache and Beard contest because we are so excited for it! Wait until you see our entry you will just LOVE it. That guy Jeff who has the Princess Sparkle (does that make him King Sparkle?) is helping Mom with our entry because she doesn't know a THING about photoshop or any of that crap. We are so excited because even if we lose the picture is going to make you laugh your head off.

Now, on to something that is not even remotely funny. Sensitive dogs should turn away at this time.

YES that is me in the bathtub and I think Dad is trying to crush my brains!!! We got baths the other night and it was horrible as usual. On top of that Mom cut our nails, I must admit that I cried like a girl but that is just because I cannot STAND this horrible treatment and I KNOW that this is the only way to get sympathy (and treats).

Look at the sad, pathetic Doofus!

I think he hates it worse than me!

Afterward he had the NERVE to sniff me and tell Mom that he thought I needed to go back in for another round! What a BRAT!

Stay tuned tomorrow, I finally got revenge on those birds that peck me in the butt...just you wait!

PS We will catch up on the other dog blogs later this evening, Mom has to go eat somewhere WITHOUT us.

38 Stains:

Blogger Ben_Benjamin said...

Whats UP !!!
Ops...Im not a doofus.
Haha look at your face, pic explain it all hah. I hate those horrible treatment too, and its the FIGHTING time for me & the hooman. But I always defeated by them, not fair 2 vs 1.

By the way, you look like those hip hop R&B fella in that towel. Cool~~

6:10 PM  
Blogger Luckie Girl said...

Hey Joey,
Oh dog, you look so sad after your shower. And Ben is right, you look like those rappers in their hooded top! :)
Where is your Mom going?? I hope she feeds you guys before heading out.

6:16 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Tanner...We had a "family meeting" and regret to inform you (as much as we love you) that your Ohio cousins, do not want you to move back to Ohio. (you're way too small for what goes on here) Besides, we like
to admire you from a distance. It's safer that way. Again, Joe, our apologies...someone had to take the Doof.

Seems like our mom has NO judgment when it comes to dogs...and Uncle Dick's beard just keeps getting longer because he has to live with the gray haired crazy dog lady. We expect that Uncle Dick will win the beard contest...even tho' he hasn't entered and isn't a dog. (we anticipate a heavy sympathy vote) Go figure...he tries to bring order to the chaos around him...but crazy dog lady sabotages his every effort.

Your Cousins

6:21 PM  
Blogger Ferndoggle said...

Hopefully the baths were cool! We hate when the humans go out to eat without us...unless they bring us their leftovers!!

Sherman, Penny & Lola

6:41 PM  
Blogger Peanut said...

Did you at least get cool water to help you stay cool in all that heat. I can't beleive your dad was trying to squish your brains. What was he thinking?

6:47 PM  
Blogger Suki said...

Getting your nails cut sucks. I hate it. They even try to wrap me up in a towel to do it and they can't, that's how strong I am! ;)

You get revenge on the birds? PAWSOME! I can't wait to see it!

Puggy kisses

6:50 PM  
Blogger Ruby Bleu said...

BATHS!!!! Oh the horror! I'm hearing rumblings that is bath time for me this weekend. I've managed the bath photo shoot but I think I'm in for it this time!!!

I can't wait to see your entry in Jacksons contest. Hey, do you think I should enter, you know being a girl and all???

Lots of Licks, Ruby

6:57 PM  
Blogger Lillie Valentine said...

How could your hoomans be soooo mean to you and give you a bath and cut your nails? That is horrible!! My mom takes me to a spa for a bath. I'm too big for her to lift in and out of the tub. Love, Lillie V

7:08 PM  
Blogger Holly said...

I don't like bath's either. Sam, Monty and Kona have been getting a lot of them lately cuz of their itchy skin issues. Thank goodness I'm not as bad as they are!


7:49 PM  
Blogger vix said...

Ahahahahahahah I had to LOL at Doofus trying to get you in for another round of bathtime! Soooo funny. How do Mom and Dad know when you need your nails clipped?

8:08 PM  
Blogger Gus said...

Oh you guys do pathetic so well! Good luck in the contest. We entered Teka!

8:09 PM  
Blogger Asta said...

Hi Joey,
It is towtuwe, and I had it done to me a few days ago was a stwuggle to the death kind of thing, but despite my super tewwier will and enewgy, Mommi won..hrmphhhh
why was your Dad twying to squeeze your bwains out? you have too much?
chin up guys, comfowt the Doofus for me too
smoochie kisses

8:30 PM  
Blogger Ben_Benjamin said...

Join our costume pawty Joey!!

8:50 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Dont'cha do zoomies after a bath and play the towel game? That makes it nearly worth the torture!

9:33 PM  
Blogger Ayatollah Mugsy said...

A beard contest? That sounds right up my alley.

9:47 PM  
Blogger Toby said...

What?? Baths and then she leaves you at home while she stuffs her face with all sorts of yummy sh.. stuff?? How dare she!?!?! I say you go back to eating the furniture to show your disapproval!


10:11 PM  
Blogger Sunshade said...

Can't wait to see your pictures!!

Joey, I have a confession to make.. I couldn't help it so I put DOOFUS on my banner... he's wearing the RED hoody to give the full DOOFUS effect. You of course is your handsome self.

Love nibbles,
Miss Sunshade

11:17 PM  
Blogger Huskee Boy said...

Oh drats.. it's bath time again huh. I think mine is gonna be this weekend.. I think I am gonna make myself sick so that I can get out of it!!

11:33 PM  
Blogger Girl Girl Hamster said...

Oh no.. I hope your dad didn't crush you and Tanner is so mean to tell your mum to give you another bath.

~ girl girl

11:54 PM  
Blogger MJ's doghouse said...

you guys look P O parents better have given you alot of treats...i hate the bath too...and what is worse is that sometimes I go for a nice big swim in the ocean...all clean and sparkly...and then when i get home...they BATH talk about dooofus...jerks...

12:12 AM  
Blogger Oscar Airedale said...

ooh, I can't wait to see your moustache photo! I am sending my entry in later on.

Whe nI get elcted, those baths will be a thing of the past!

Oscar x

1:16 AM  
Blogger Simba said...

Not you too. What is it with humans and baths? Did you have a head ache?

Simba xx

1:25 AM  
Blogger ToFFee said...


bathie! I don't like bathie...

But I'm sure it will cool you down!

In our location, water is also warm... sniff sniff!!


2:06 AM  
Blogger Maggie said...

I can't wait to see your moustache photos! Mom has been having lots of trouble getting mine. It's been hot here and I just don't want to cooperate! I wish the woman would just leave me alone!

Love ya lots,

2:42 AM  
Blogger wally said...

Awwww. Poor guys. We hardly ever get baths because we smell loverly! And also bathing 100+ pound of dog is not fun.

I can't wait to see your beard/moustache. I need one of those photoshops. I wonder if we have any on Main Street.


2:48 AM  
Blogger Amber-Mae said...

Oh, your dady's really gentle with ya huh!? And poor doofus... Must be freezing after a bath but how can it be? It's sweltering HOT there right!? Hmmmppfff! He's just trying to show his pathetic pitiful face to your hoomans so that they will show him more attention. Hehehe, spoilt BRAT! I'm spoilt too...

Yeah, I entered for that competition too. I'm a bearded girl! I hope I win! hehehehehe...

Love licks,
Solid Gold Dancer

5:09 AM  
Blogger umekotyan said...

The expression of going up in the bath tells ..pleasant... The bath is good in the
hot season. :)

from loved ume tyan

5:42 AM  
Anonymous fig said...

I think your parents are sadists. Kinda like my girl....

7:33 AM  
Blogger Murphey said...

Ah man, I HATE baths, and toe nail clipping, and brushing and all that other grooming sh*&. Why do they do it?


7:58 AM  
Blogger Sophie Brador said...

Joe, It sounds like you are issuing a challenge with that whole beard thing. Well, you're on buddy!

In the meantime, Buck up Joey boy. Those nail clips are some massive torture, but you have to be very Keifer Sutherland about it all. Just bark in a whisper and get yourself a cell phone.

8:38 AM  
Blogger Reina the Doxie said...

Hi Joey,

Nah, your father doesn't look like he is gona crush ur brains. It seems that he has soft touches!
I think you look like JAY-Z with the towel over you!


9:18 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

That's just tragic! You guys are so mistreated!

10:31 AM  
Blogger Balboa said...

Not only are you being tortured with a bath, but your dad's is crushing your brains????? WHAT????

I guess you were too strong for him. Glad to see you made it out safely.

Frenchie Snorts

11:00 AM  
Blogger Tadpole said...

Ohhhhhhh.... *shudder*

I can't stand to look :*(

12:10 PM  
Blogger Frasypoo said...

I think some mean person somewhere invented baths so they could torture us poor defenceless animal!

12:46 PM  
Blogger Jackson said...

Why are humans so obssessed with baths and stuff? I'm having my hair done tomorrow so I know that I'll be bathed and my nails will be clipped. Yuck! And I was just getting nice and stinky too. J x

12:50 PM  
Blogger coco said...

you are both so incredibly beautiful. i don't actually get baths, i get showers because we have this cool big shower with a hand-held shower head, and my mom thinks that is so much easier on me and sophie. but i abhore it just the same.

anyway, the bestest thing about baths and showers, in my little opinion, is afterwards when we get to run and run and run and run and rub up against stuff and run and run...

know what i mean?

6:09 PM  
Blogger Stanley said...

Joe Dog!

What can I say?? The hoomans think the stinkiest things smell great, and couldn't identify a truly great smell if it flew right up their nose. Hence, the bath ritual.

Can't wait to see your mustache pics! I'm entering, but my girl said I had to go a natural! (I think it's just because she doesn't know how to use photo shop).

Goob love,

3:58 PM  

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