Joe Stains

This is the blog of an angry old boston terrier. (and his little brother Tanner who gets to post every Tuesday)

Friday, October 03, 2008

Solutions to Problems

Since Tanner decided to do this candy delivery with his (so-called) twin, I was roped into helping. So many dogs requested chocolate yet we all know that chocolate is very bad for dogs.

This is where I come in. Many of you may not realize that on top of being 'the best' and a detective, I am also a trained chef. (you don't think Mom just figured out how to cook so well on her own do you?)

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I took it upon myself to create a chocolate sauce that is SAFE for dogs. I cannot divulge the recipe as I am currently working on selling it to a certain, wealthy media mogul (who may or may not wear a robe and answer to the name Hugh) and he would not be happy if the recipe got out.

BUT I have contacted all the major candy manufacturers and they have agreed to provide special batches of everything you guys have asked for!!

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Sometimes being THE Joe Stains has its advantages.

33 Stains:

Blogger Sunny,Scooter,Jamie said...

OOOHH then we want some chocolate too!! we have never had any. maybe a jar of it to pour over our kibble!!
And Joe, I don't think you are balding all over. You are still very handsome. You shouldn't be jelly over my beard-Geez, I am a girl for pete sake. I am only allowing it for Mom>

8:13 PM  
Blogger Sunny,Scooter,Jamie said...

hay joey. whut do u meen so called twin? we gived u the pruf!
u must be jelly tannerer haz a twinny! doan be jelly joey, it iz ok tannerer haz a reel live twin!
Hi 5s
Scooter(yer twin in law???? haha scooter joke!)

8:17 PM  
Blogger meemsnyc said...

Ooooh we want your special Joey's chocolate sauce. YUMMMY.

8:58 PM  
Blogger MJ's doghouse said...

scoooooooooooooooooooore....i love chocolate...and i dont care if it is bad for me...i want morrrrre and moreeeeeeeeeeeee...go joey

9:24 PM  
Blogger Khyra The Siberian Husky said...


I'll test it here in PA!!



9:27 PM  
Blogger Lacy said...

w00f's Joey and tanner, me furgot to put me order in, me wood like sum chocolate toooo please...

b safe,

pps, hmmm chocolate hot dogs sooounds yummy to me...

9:27 PM  
Blogger Simba said...

You are so clever! I hope Tanner delivers some of that stuff to me.

Simba x

1:34 AM  
Blogger umekotyan said...

Good evening joey.
The adventure of Halloween is happy.
Wonderful time from the lesson of the devil's-food cake.
A wonderful weekend with chef's caprice. :D

from loved ume tyan

4:06 AM  
Blogger Abby said...

Hi, Joey...

Ohhh...I didn't ask for chocolate, cuz my Mom won't let me have it...

I asked for something with peanut butter & some Froot Loops...

Maybe you could throw in a litte chocolate, too????

Abby xxxooo

4:35 AM  
Blogger Gus said...

Joe, you should assume your chef persona more often. It makes you look very handsome. Even Teka is impressed! Oh, and she wants enough chocolate sauce to bathe in. I think she must have a hot date with Swede William.

K, thx

5:25 AM  
Blogger Snowball said...

Can I try some of this chocolate too?


6:14 AM  
Blogger vix said...



6:46 AM  
Blogger Mack said...

You are my hero dude!

6:51 AM  
Blogger Mango the Maltese kiddo said...

You need a helper to test your candy sample? I need a part time job to help my mom pull it through this rough time.

8:12 AM  
Blogger The Army of Four said...

Joe! You are an amazing pup of countless talents! Mmm... chocolate!
Tail wags,

9:04 AM  
Blogger Lorenza said...

A chocolate sauce that is pet safe??
OMD! I'd love to taste it!
If someone can do it... it is YOU!
Kisses and hugs

9:06 AM  
Blogger Asta said...

I didn't even dawe ask fow chocolate, but I had no idea that THE Joe Stains would be wowking on this that I know..I would love some pleez!
You awe amazing..of couwse I should have known that all along
smoochie thankful kisses

9:23 AM  
Blogger Moco said...

That chef outfit makes your girth look more like Tanners. Yum-O anyway. Do you think there could be mass marketing in the future?

9:25 AM  
Blogger The Girl said...

Wrooooo, wrooooo, wroooooo! Joe, you are the BEST!!!

Brown dog kisses,

11:35 AM  
Blogger Sophie Brador said...

Yeah, that's cool and everything Joe, but I didn't ask for chocolate. I asked for you.


11:50 AM  
Blogger DESERT PUPS said...

Woof Joey and Tanner

A trained chef eh? Pawsome. Could you come down to Tucson and teach our Mom? And bring that chocolate, it looks yummy.
Congratulations on winning the prize from Ben the Rotti. Woo-woo! And we'd like to thank you for suggesting the Gucci handbag for a present for Gucci, she loved it.

Desert Pups

1:24 PM  
Blogger Aggie said...

OMDOG!!!! Chocolate!!!!! PET SAFE!!!! You do not need to say anymore!!! I will be on the next jet to see you!

See you SOON!!


4:30 PM  
Blogger Deefor said...

Wow. Can I get some chocolate? You look good in that chef's hat. I just hope I don't get too scared seeing Tanner flying over my house.


4:38 PM  
Blogger Lola Smiles said...

and don't forget the peanut butter! I knew you could do it Joey!

5:16 PM  
Blogger Charlie Daniels said...

Ooohhh Joe, I would love some of that!



5:52 PM  
Blogger wally said...

My baby brudder sometimes thinks he finds dog-safe chocolate in the yard. He is totes gross. I would definitely be a customer of your goods.

wally t.

5:55 PM  
Blogger Maggie and Mitch said...

You're our man, Joey! You're going to be rich beyond your dreams!

Love ya lots,
Maggie and Mitch

2:58 AM  
Blogger Shadow / Molly said...

Hai Joe, it is I is Jake! Did yoo know dat we cud has white chocolate? Oh yea buddy we can!! It is safer than the brown stuff. I didnt believes it either - here has a look

Now ta get mom ta share sum wif me!


::springs in my feet::
::springs in my feet::

I is Jake!

10:52 AM  
Blogger Toffee said...

mmmm chocolate...

btw - my dad answers to the name Hugh too!

you watching football??

1:40 PM  
Blogger BenTheRotti said...

Joe you are my HERO!! a doggy safe Chocolate.. is it bad for two leggeds?? Can I tell them hands off or it will poison them?? Oh I do hope so!

We sing the song about a twinkling star too but Lilli is a bit of a rebel like me so she sings the alternate version hehehe


Ben xxxx

3:04 AM  
Blogger Petra said...

Well, by golly, Chef Joe, let me add another order of candy to Tanner's list since chocolate is safe to eat now. I'd like a LARGE bag of bridge mix, please.


8:31 AM  
Blogger Lady Kaos said...

That is wonderful news!!!!!!!

2:19 PM  
Blogger Dewey Dewster said...


If ya get that chocolate on the market....we'll be yer first customers....we always want the candy that Gram makes but she doesn't share at all... with us anyway....hope ya hit it big...

Dewey Dewster here....

9:24 AM  

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