Joe Stains

This is the blog of an angry old boston terrier. (and his little brother Tanner who gets to post every Tuesday)

Thursday, March 01, 2007

the woman has gone crazy

First of all, thank you all for your love and support. I *know* the Doofus should be allowed to get love and junk, but its hard sharing the spotlight! Mom said that you dogs don't have to have a favorite, just like she doesn't have a favorite between Tanner and I. Which is fine, because I know that I am Dad's favorite. (note from Mom - lets not put words in Dad's mouth while he is off drumming)

So a lot of the new readers asked how I might possibly have 4 birthdays, well this is purely a result of bad parenting. Somehow my records have been sucked into the vast array of 'paperwork' at my grandparent's house. Mom says my birthday is March 6th, Dad says it is March 9th. Since Mom is my lovely blog assistant we will say that she is probably right. However, as we do not know for sure I have declared March 6-9th JOEY PALOOZA!!!!!!!! A four day celebration of my birth!! I certainly hope Mom and Dad are doing some SERIOUS shopping.

And by serious shopping I don't mean this...

who knew?
What is this woman THINKING when she buys this stuff?! She always remarks that things like this are 'on sale' so she has to try them. I believe that by purchasing this she is implying that our breath is something less than wonderful, which I would have to disagree with. The dog on the package looks like buster, gus, butchy, snickers and mackie!!!!! Does that imply that WFT's have STINKY breath by default? I think all WFT's should SUE for defamation!

Anyway, try as I might to be upset, I like to eat pretty much everything, so I lined up for one of these things.

NOW
Ok lady...anytime now...

GIVE IT TO ME
Seriously, I am getting old I cannot sustain this pose forever!!!

eeecchhh
I took off with mine, but here is the Doofus giving it a sample. He is such....a ..... DOOFUS!!!!!!!

smile!
Tanner smiled and asked if his breath still smelled like poop?

Actually Mom said they worked pretty well, so she will save them for when we are extra stinky. Whatever, I have smelled some of that cheese she eats, it smells like dirty FEET!

Anyway, its almost FRIDAY! Woooo!

26 Stains:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Joey, what kinds of things DO you wish for????

Would you like a shiny new human big brother to play with? Someone really cute and energetic that would maybe occupy Tanner so you could have some alone time?? Think about it. It could really work out for you!

6:48 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Despite the Doofus Blogs...You are THE MAN Joey! Thanks for tolerating the "Doof". He needs guidance, 'big time'. Aunt Patty

6:59 PM  
Blogger Fu Fu said...

Yeah. Joey are you looking forward to your birthday? I hope there's a big pawty for you. Hee. Tanner looks like he's ready to endorse for that breath product.

~ fufu

7:46 PM  
Blogger Gus said...

Hey Joey: March the 6th is my sister E.Beth's birthday too. Except we know for sure that is the right date for her, 'cause Dad was right there when she popped out. EEEUUUW! Disgusting. To think that my muzzer did something like that.

Anyway, we're hoping you get good prezzies and we will share E.Beth with you.

Gussie and Teka

8:01 PM  
Blogger Emily and Ike said...

I love foot cheese!
Ike

8:26 PM  
Blogger Myeo said...

When Mama saw this post of yours, she said that she will get it for us. What is wrong with these hoomans? We dont think our breath stinks either.

Love
Boy n Baby

8:40 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

wow, are those breath mints??? did your mom try them to see if they burn the tongue? i've tried hooman toothpaste and wasabi, they are NOT kind to the tongue!!! but since tanner is so happy with them i guess they're ok.

love..
chiyo

9:34 PM  
Blogger The Brat Pack said...

These pictures made us roll on the floor laughing! We tried these but HATED them!

Our vote is for Burts Bees Doggie Drops - YUMMY!

The Brat Pack

9:41 PM  
Blogger Deanna said...

OMG how does he always look like such a dork?!?!?

10:03 PM  
Blogger Toby said...

Hey, my daddy has a few packs of those breath thingys too!! But I don't think his breath is that bad...hehehe.

Joey, where's ur birthday party at?

Tobes

12:42 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Oh heck ... my DAD eats those things ... do you think he gets his at the pet store too?

12:48 AM  
Blogger Herbie said...

gosh.... I want to have a whole week for my birthday!

1:04 AM  
Blogger Simba and Jazzi said...

Do you get a present everyday for 4 days and 4 cakes? I wish I had bad parents.

Simba xx

2:20 AM  
Blogger Molly the Airedale said...

You have to be the only dog that gets to have a whole week of birthdays! What an organizer you are! I can't wait to see all the loot you haul in!

Love ya lots,
Maggie

3:37 AM  
Blogger Oscar's mummy and daddy said...

I don't believe I ever have stinky breath, & I'm sure you don't either. Hoomans are just weird.

Licks
Oscar x

4:29 AM  
Blogger The Army of Four said...

I like the picture of Tanner smiling!
Love,
Amber

8:59 AM  
Blogger Marvin -The Hollow Hound said...

he he he! I love the Doofus faces!

Marv xxxx

10:13 AM  
Blogger Willie and Waylon said...

We are very excited for your b-day week. Maybe your mom can just give the breath strips to Doofus.. he looks like he really needs them

2:55 PM  
Blogger Loui (and his mum!) said...

Are those breath things like the hooman ones?? They stick to the roof of your mouth and take a lot of work to get them off....I only know as I once investigated mums handbag and found a little pack of them and 'er....ate them!

Loui xx

5:09 PM  
Blogger Liza said...

OMG!!! Dory's mom here. Before DOry got adopted we had a lovely old lady labrador named Emily. unfortunately Em had horrid breath and I gave her human breath strips all the time!! Now they actually have doggie one - good grief!!

Joe - tell your mom the people ones are fine for dogs too (according to our vet too) and probably half the price!!

As always - you brighten our day!!

Liza (and Dory too)

5:29 PM  
Blogger wally said...

that is sooooooo not the face of a p-i-m-p. i bet you guys smell awesome. and i'd like some feet cheese. sorry i'm free associating.

wally.

7:01 PM  
Blogger Rudy said...

Oh nooo, now that Mom saw the picture of the breath strips she's thinking of getting some more for us! I had some and I didn't like it one bit, but Mom says I do have stinky breath. I'd rather have some foot cheese!

You're so right about the picture on the breath strips package. I'd sue!! At least you guys get your pics on things. Most of the world never even heard of my breed.

9:20 PM  
Blogger Boo Casanova said...

gosh! a breath mint for doggies? that's totally insane. doggie mouth supposed to be stinky coz we eat all kind of stuff that hooman doesn't eat. ok ok, i think the hooman eat more stuff that we don't eat.

wet wet licks

Boo

9:58 PM  
Blogger Cash said...

Do you and Butchy & Snickers have a good attorney?
har har,
Jasper

8:11 AM  
Blogger Cash said...

P.S.
I had really bad breath...I MEAN BAD...like rotting rabbit carcus...even I WILL ADMIT it...Momma and Sissy did not even like getting me in a small enclosed place (like a car) because it was so bad.
I went to my Vet and he examined me...and said my teeth had too much tartar build up and that I had some bad teeth. So, after a good teeth cleaning...and getting two pulled (in the back)...my breath is PUPPY FRESH!!!
Jasper

8:13 AM  
Blogger Isabella said...

Well, I know I am Linda's favorite- she tells me all the time. But she does lie to me about things sometimes so I guess I can't be too sure. Nah, I really am,I can tell the way she talks nice to me but yells at Emmy for things like pooping on their bed.

So what did the breath things taste like? Were they yummy? But instead of those weird strips, your mom could give you a bowl of mint ice cream. Write mint ice cream on the grocery list and tell her you need it to refresh your teeth and mouth.
Big Wags.
Isabella

11:19 PM  

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