Joe Stains

This is the blog of an angry old boston terrier. (and his little brother Tanner who gets to post every Tuesday)

Tuesday, February 02, 2010

Tanner Public Services

GUYS!!! I have a SUPER SERIOUS public nouncement to make!!

There is new EVIL furniture that EATS YOUR CUZ and does not give them back to you no matter how much you FIGHT IT!!!

OMDOG Could you SEE ME?! I was furiously trying to free the CUZ!

EVEN that Joe Stains COULD NOT get the Cuz out!!?! WTF?! Please beware of these furnitures ok?! P.S. UMM if you called and tried to leave a message...our answering machine kinda may not be ummm working quite like it is sposed to...probably because that EVIL FURNITURES killed it.

AND ANOTHER THING... I think Petsmart is doing strange things in their 'Pet DayCare' center...I think it is some CRAZY science lab. not a crazy humpmeister Lab like Dexter...but like Honey I Shrunk the Dog Lab...

OMDOG! Seriously, that one dog is like SO TINY and that other dog is like SO GIANT then the other two are OBVIOUSLIATELY CLONES!!

PLease Beware of these VERY scary and dangerous things I have discovered.

Tan Torkelson investigativering reporter OUT

36 Stains:

Blogger MJ's doghouse said...

holy crap tanner....that science lab is very strange...i cant deicde if the shrunked the dog or blowed up the other dog...but they definately cloneded the otehr dog...if i was you i would tell your people to move the dumb guys

10:28 PM  
Blogger Bobby said...

Thanks for the laugh, so early in the morning to. I think you do need to keep an eye on the day care centre. If they clone the big one they will be no room for any other furbody on this planet.

12:28 AM  
Blogger Bobby said...

Oh yes the table is going to cause a hole in the carpet and snapped wires.

12:29 AM  
Blogger Maggie and Mitch said...

Thanks for letting us know about evil furniture like this, Joey! We'll be sure to keep our Cuz's safe from harm!

Love ya lots,
Maggie and Mitch

3:35 AM  
Blogger Mango said...

Somehow I don't have that problem, but we do have a lot of unstable furniture that seems to spontaneously tip over when there is a toy underneath. Totally scares me.

Stay away from that laboratory. Did you see any Khryacie beasts in there?


3:36 AM  
Blogger Agatha and Archie said...

Sigh.....I don't know why I let Archie read your stuff Tan.....because he is a clone of you..He is in the basement working on a cloner machine.He thinks if there are more of him then he could slide right into my bomb shelter......Love A+A PS Unfortunately I have to agree with you about some types of furniture.It happens to me frequently..You just have to knock the whole thing over..Works like a charm...

6:27 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

That's a Frankenstein contraption! Maybe you should call the machine and ask for it to free your CUZ??

6:37 AM  
Blogger BRUTUS said...

That table is so evil it even knows how to taunt you! Not bad enough that it ate your cuz, but it'll let you see it and not be able to get it?? The injustice!!

Brutus the Frenchie

7:23 AM  
Blogger Boston Ventures said...

The Boston Terriers look quite fierce. It is amazing that the characteristics they display are all so similar. My Boston, hides his toys and bones in blankets or under pillows and when he sees us looking at him, he lets out a big sigh, picks it up and goes to hide is somewhere else. I have a website for pet supplies that was built because of him.Check it out at

7:27 AM  
Blogger Gus said...

Dear Tanner...we have observed strange things at PetSmart know, they don't want to put me in the same room as big dogs, and I LOVE the big guys...they are so easy to intimidate!

Also, we have observed the Muzzer's bed eating toys, and it also tries to eat Gussie when he goes under to get them out. Then the Muzzer has to come in and lift up the bed to get the Gussie out.


Teka Toy

7:46 AM  
Blogger Pearl said...

Tanner, I don't know what any of us would do without your investigerations.

That table is EVIL! It is TAUNTING YOU!!!!

8:03 AM  
Blogger Dennis the Vizsla said...

hello tanner its dennis the vizsla dog hay wow it is like the furnitcher has sum sort of forse feeld!!! and so duz that weerd sell at petsmart!!! hoo noo teknolodjy had bekum so advansd??? ok bye

8:22 AM  
Blogger Ruby Bleu said...

The biggest question I have...did you ever get the cuz back? Also, I'd be real interested to see when/how the furniture ate it too!!!!

Lots of Licks, Ruby

P(ee)S: Happy more than 1000 posts...sorry I didn't right and Mom LOVE you pups (and your Mom too)

8:50 AM  
Blogger Khyra The Siberian Husky And Sometimes Her Mom said...

Well, if woo two khan't free The Khuz, we KNOW The Beastie khan't even begin to slip under the evil table!

PeeEssWoo: Mango RH posed a good khwestion: did woo see any KhyraceJacie khreatures?

9:46 AM  
Blogger Fred said...

I might have been cloned from that puppy at the science lab! OMD! Meanwhile, sorry you lost your cuz to the evil furniture. Boo.

10:05 AM  
Blogger Sophie Brador said...

Tanner, If your mom put some sandpaper on that glass shelf, you could file your nails while you dig for the cuz. It sure was nice to see Joey.


11:20 AM  
Blogger Eric said...

Nooooo. Cuz are my favourites tanner. In this house they seem to die pretty quick by teeth other than those furniture ones.

Yep those dogs look cloned to me. Gulp. Didn't have wheels attached too did they?

Worried...Eric x

11:57 AM  
Blogger The OP Pack said...

What would we do without you, Tanner - guess we won't be rushing to those daycare places either - they might try to shrink our fluffy tails. As for the evil furniture, can you try knocking it over like Mango does?

Woos, Phantom and Thunder

12:54 PM  
Blogger Deetz said...

You have never failed to fill my heart with laughter and I came over today thinking, surely they will not make me laugh, since my heart has been broken with Sharkie's tragic accident....but you did it again, made me laugh....
Huge Aire Hugs (don't tell anyone I hugged you okay)
Bravo on your reporting.

1:05 PM  
Blogger Wild Dingo said...

OM DAWG, you guys are CRACKER DOG INSANE! that was wicked how the furniture at the Cuz.

and we're so not stepping foot near that LAB!
wild dingo

1:57 PM  
Blogger Winnie and Lilly said...

Lilly has been checking under all of our "evil" furniture looking for my cuz toys. She also says that she will not step foot in Petsmart again because that "lab" freaked her out.
Thank you for new ways to torture...I mean help my sister.

3:39 PM  
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3:44 PM  
Blogger Stanislaw said...

I think the cruel thing there is that those dogs looks so BORED! Which I totally wouldn't be if I were made tiny. OR huge. Or had a clone of myself. I'd be having a party with my size XL party animal clone!!! How AWESOME would that be??!! Wait... where did you say this place was...?

3:51 PM  
Blogger The Army of Four said...

That PetsMart thing is downright freaky! Really.

3:54 PM  
Blogger wally said...

Oh crap. Glad I don't go to that day care. Maybe that's what happened to my legs! And my brudder's missing brain!

wally t.

6:46 PM  
Blogger Benny and Lily said...

Holy got that right. plain evil
Benny & Lily

6:56 PM  
Blogger Holly and Khady said...

Wow, that is the scariest thing I think I have ever seen! But, I must say, your digging skills are tremendous! You can come work in our yard any time!

BTW, I think your humans phone is from 1985.


8:08 PM  
Blogger Huskee and Hershey said...

Thank you Reporter Tanner, for your astute reporting. That science lab is sure one scary place that I do NOT want to be in..
Good luck with trying to free your Cuz!

8:50 PM  
Blogger Asta said...

Thank dog that you awe watching out fow all of us and making these wepowtings and consoomew allewtses.
That fuwnitoowe is scoffing at youw attempts to fwee youw cuz. It was howwibull to watch.
I hope youw Dad is all bettew fwom his cold wif Joey's ministwations
smoochie kisses
pee ess..I'm NEVEW going to a day cawe centew

9:15 PM  
Blogger Deefor said...

We have some evil furniture in our house but not as bad as yours. You can see your cuz and it won't give it back! I never trusted petsmart for a doggie daycare. It just doesn't look like fun in there. What did they do to that poor doggie. Maybe they can shrink Arrow.

9:18 PM  
Blogger kissa-bull said...

holy moly that things is quite evil and scary
we are shiveringin our knickers
we hope to never have to encounter that in our home
be safe my furryend
pibble sugars
the houston pittie pack

9:20 PM  
Blogger Ike said...

OMD That table is the worst!

11:29 PM  
Blogger BRUTUS said...

Hey guys - I did a little public service announcement too! And you, um, well, sorta ended up in it, Tanner. Hope you don't mind (I don't think Joe will...). Come on over & check it out (you are waaaaay at the end).

Brutus the Frenchie

9:44 AM  
Blogger Ike said...

I'm sorry, man. My mom said and she controls the food.

6:15 PM  
Blogger Archie said...

Oh Tanner, that is the most hilarious post I ever read! BOL! Thank you for the very funny, but oh so serious, warnings!

8:52 PM  
Blogger Nitheesh said...

Woooooooooooooooooooooooooooooow /Hey thanks man!! you are so good. I think this the perfect work.

Day Care Centres

11:29 PM  

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