Joe Stains

This is the blog of an angry old boston terrier. (and his little brother Tanner who gets to post every Tuesday)

Monday, November 16, 2009


So you may remember that my humans went to that Amsterdam place last year for their honeymoon, and while they were there, Mom took THIS picture...

blog pic
That bar in Amsterdam had a CAT and it SAT on my DAD. The cat can be in there, but the sign on the door says NO DOGS. Well, what a bunch of crap right?? So they go back to that bar last week and look what happens...

That CAT totally remembered my Dad!! WTF?!

OMDOG!?! My Dad did not listen when I yelled at him about this LAST time and he pet that cat AGAIN and let it sit on him. I was furious. But oh dear readers, you won't even believe what my Mom did. Oh boy, hold on to your collars friends...

WTF?! There is a CAT on her LAP while she is eating!!! I am not even allowed to put my paws on the humans when they are eating and this CAT gets to sit on her LAP? Amsterdam is clearly a place filled with sin and depravity to allow such things to happen.

But then, this video made my brain completely explode. I don't remember the last time I was so mad...

OMDOG!!!!!!!!!! The CAT was ON THE TABLE. ON THE FRICKIN TABLE. I am hiding Mom and Dad's passports and never letting them go back there EVER AGAIN. Mom said the kitty was just SO CUTE and she didn't mind it finishing her crumbs. HELLO, I AM THE CUTEST THING YOU HAVE EVER SEEN and can you guess how many times I have been allowed to climb on the table and eat crumbs???

So then it goes right on over to Dad and asks for some fries!!

I am hoping beyond hope that in this picture Dad is telling that BAD BAD KITTY that it better never come around him and my Mom ever again or Joe Stains will totally pee on it!!!


29 Stains:

Blogger Sophie Brador said...

Joey! That cat your dad was hanging with in the bar looks exactly like Dick the cat who used to live in a bar in Toronto about 15 years ago. Do you think Dick retired to Amsterdam?

Sorry about your Steelers and all those kitties stinkin' up your mom and dad. Hopefully they showered before they came home and didn't bring any of those kitty germs with them.


6:54 PM  
Blogger Unknown said...

Now now, Joey, remember I live with a cat. And I've learned plenty from him about how to get snacks and the best place to nap on the couch and don't forget - those delicious kitty logs. You may have to reconsider...

Your pal,

Petey and his catbro Mica

P.S. Mica was watching over Mom's arm as she was typing - he totally gets away with begging for food and licking off the plate when she turns her back! SO not fair.

7:22 PM  
Blogger NAK and The Residents of The Khottage Now With KhattleDog! said...

I think that is grounds fur The Phillies to be dekhlared the REAL winners of The World Series -


I khan't believe they did that to WOO!


8:27 PM  
Blogger Lorenza said...

I am speechless, Joey!
Did you check their bags when they came home?? I don't want you to have a surprise!!
Kisses and hugs

8:56 PM  
Blogger Dewey Dewster said...

Yep Joey...the Steelers lost again....I must say that we have not been doin' a good job at cheerin' for the big guys lately...we need ta channel some of that healin' zen right ta our team....

I can see why ya were upset at those cat pictures.....seems like yer Ps are traitors....fer sure....I think the 2 of ya need ta go on strike....withhold all affection until ya get ta lick a plate or sit at the table....

We don't get ta sit at the table but Gram 'n Pap know that it is our job to lick the plates after they eat....we get ta do it on the floor most of the time....I mean that is the kind of job that is really important.....ya know the Ps can't do as good a job as we siree....I think ya have a great case ta make fer gettin' that job as yer own....

Dewey Dewster here....

9:04 PM  
Blogger Two French Bulldogs said...

Now we have seen everything!!! Those cats obviously do not understand English
Benny & Lily

9:27 PM  
Blogger Oskar said...

Dude, I have to live with 2 of those things every single day!

You must stop your humans before they bring one home!

10:09 PM  
Blogger Emily and Ike said...


10:44 PM  
Blogger Asta said...

I must say I am howwified..not so much by the kitty,but youw pawents behaviow..I suwe hope they ment theiw ways befowe it's too late and let the cutest dog in the wowld (you) finish off all theiw food fwom now on.
(You can send them to my mommi fow lessons if you want)
I hope they had theiw clothes disinfected aftew theiw time in sin city
so sowwy about the loss
smoochie kisses

11:20 PM  
Blogger Huskee and Hershey said...

Gosh.. sounds like a terrible day for you Joey...
Gee.. those kitties were totally schmoozing your mom and dad! To be on the safe side, I reckon you should pee and poop on their passports (and say Tanner did it) before they decide to bring the kitties home on their NEXT trip to Amsterdam!!

12:24 AM  
Blogger Morgan in Pittsburgh said...

That's how they are (the cats) and they get away with it. Happens here all the time. You get used to it. Nothing you can do about it anyways...they'll just hit you. And then you get blamed for pestering them.
your pal, Morgan

1:25 AM  
Blogger Snowball said...

hmmm...Thanks for telling me. I will make sure my hooman don't go to those places.


4:08 AM  
Blogger Dexter said...

That is so totally messed up I don't know where to begin. When they get back, you just demand a seat at the table and your own plate from now on.


4:13 AM  
Blogger Gus said...

UM...Joe. There are TWO cats in those pictures. Your folks clearly have some 'splainin to do


6:28 AM  
Blogger Ruby Bleu said...

Wow Joe...
I'm barkless over here...I sure hope this doesn't mean they like cats better than dogs!!! What if they are thinking of getting a cat now....OMD...I just need to stop thinking about's hurting my head!

Lots of Licks, Ruby

6:35 AM  
Blogger The Airechicks said...

Well, we're totally barkless - and to take pictures and videos that's that's that's just the most most most - we can't even think of the right words for this situation.

Santa Paws will be hearing of this!!!!


6:40 AM  
Blogger Agatha and Archie said...

And you will not believe this but this is me Archie..AGATHA FAINTED.....right in front of me...she saw that cat first on your dad's lap AND THEN ON THE FRIGGING TABLE.Well you know her and cats( I am a bit more mellow about the whole thing) As she was fainting i think I heard her say Archie you better get plane reservations for the boys so they can come here...I think.. of else she said WTF Love archie

6:58 AM  
Blogger Kelly said...


(Pearl cannot currently respond because she fainted in horror and disbelief.)

7:27 AM  
Blogger TwoSpecialWires said...

The LEAST they could do would be put their plates on the floor for you to lick clean. This was wrong. Simply wrong. A CATaclysmic injustice. We're feeling for you, and we're pretty much glad we couldn't hear the sweet nothings your dad appeared to be whispering to that cat. (Ya have to admit, though, those kitties are sorta cute! Could you smell 'em when they got home?)

Jake and Fergs xxoo

7:30 AM  
Blogger The Oceanside Animals said...

It's Amsterdam, dude. Anything goes.

8:37 AM  
Blogger Fred said...

That's terrible! What a scary place that is.

8:50 AM  
Blogger The Army of Four said...

Holy cat, Joe! This is SHOCKING! Maybe somebuddy was like MAKING your parents do that or something! I mean ... CATS?!?!?

1:26 PM  
Blogger Moco said...

That is just more than should be put up for anyone.

1:31 PM  
Blogger Ozzie, Rocky and Lola said...

Oh Joe, calm down now! We are sure that those cats realized that your parents are celebrities because they are the parents of the famous, world renowned Joseph Stains! Being close to your 'rents was the best way they could get close to you, lol...
Ozzie & Rocky

3:52 PM  
Blogger ♥♥ The OP Pack ♥♥ said...

Oh dear dear Joey, you really had a bad day. We don't get humans who let cats walk on tables and eat off plates. We don't get to do that here either. We get in trouble if we try to help clean the dishes in the dishwasher - just trying to save water.

We sure hope they brought you home something really extra special to make up for all that CATastrophe junk.

Woos, the OP Pack

3:57 PM  
Blogger BRUTUS said...

Geez. I've heard Amesterdam is sin city, but never quite thought of it this way! Guess the health department regulations are a little more lenient there? Don't worry, I bet they had cat hair in the food...

Anti-Feline Snorts-
Brutus the Frenchie

5:08 PM  
Blogger Stella said...

This can only mean ONE thing, guys,
they are preparing you to know they like cats and plan to get a couple.

Its easy to see they both really enjoy cats, probably because cats are quiet, good natured and don't bellyache about every minor thing that comes along. 'Nuff said?


7:27 PM  
Blogger Duke said...

Clearly the cats are out of control in Amsterdam!

Love ya lots,
Maggie and Mitch

3:08 AM  
Blogger Deetz said...

WTF? man....
That is just crazy. That one kitty looks like my kitty kat.
I gotta go now, mum wants to know what WTF means and I got some explain'n to

3:20 PM  

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