Joe Stains

This is the blog of an angry old boston terrier. (and his little brother Tanner who gets to post every Tuesday)

Tuesday, December 15, 2009

I saw Momma kissing JOEEEY STAAAINS...

So JOE did some investigationing to find Mom has been busy doing things that were not our blog. He was MAD.

He came and found me to say how mad he was...




I was having FUN dancing to some MTV songs and he said OMDOG life stinks and I want to poop on the floor and all that whiny drama queen stuff he does.




Then he said, WHY ARE YOU SMILING WHEN LIFE IS SO TERRIBLE?! He was looking like he was about to crap on that floor again when I said...




OH JOEY that fat man from the North Pool is checking that NAUGHTY list to see what dogs get toys and treats and what dogs get lumps of COAL. Guess what FLOOR CRAPPER?? You are on that naughty list and do you know who TELLS that Santa Paws guy about what dogs are GOOD and what Dogs are NOT, it is MOM. Well you will NOT even believe what happened, thank DOG I had my camera...




OMDOG. THAT is one grumpy Joe giving SMOOCHIE KISSES!!!!!!




WTF?!?!?




He must REALLY want some good pressies for Christmas this year!!! I need to tell him that Santa says he should totally let me sleep in that snuggins ball too!

TAN TORKELSON SANTA'S HELPER SIGNING OFF!!!

36 Stains:

Blogger Mango said...

Joey is a pro, no doubt about it. The people have very simple minds and a little cute dog smoochie face makes them forget any bad stuff right away.

Slobbers,
Mango

4:11 AM  
Blogger MAX said...

Hey I could do with a Stainy Smoochie myself...your mom has the cherry on the top!
Warmest Christmas wishes to you all.
MAXDOG IN SOUTH AFRICA

4:15 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

You guys are so adorable. Maybe your mom had food on her face.

5:37 AM  
Blogger Mack said...

I just hope it's not too late. Floor crapping is pretty serious (& fun) business.

5:44 AM  
Blogger Gus said...

Those are great photos of Joey and your Mom. But I don't think you are gonna win the snuggie ball contest. Ask Santa to bring you one of your own.

gussie

7:48 AM  
Blogger Pug(s) and Bugg said...

BOL!!!! Now that's a BT who knows he's getting coal!!!!!! BOL! hope his plan works!

7:52 AM  
OpenID iheartsnark said...

Maybe you should get one of those Elfs on a Shelf! Put it right in front where JOE does his *best* staining work.

Happy Festivus!

8:18 AM  
Blogger Fred said...

That's awesome! I knew, deep down in my heart, that Joe loved kisses as much as the rest of us.

8:30 AM  
Blogger Ruby Bleu said...

A dogs gotta do, what a dogs gotta do!!!

Lots of Licks, Ruby

8:39 AM  
Blogger Dennis the Vizsla said...

Busted!!!

9:02 AM  
Blogger Kari in WeHo said...

Joey is sure good at the kiss and make up stuff!

9:33 AM  
Blogger Stanislaw said...

Hey dude. Maybe your mom just feasted on a peanut butter sandwich. Tell Joey that this Santa dude knows when you are feasting, he knows when you're awake, he knows when you've done pees and poos so be good for goodness sake.

9:37 AM  
Blogger Two Country Poodles said...

Joe Stains is a "KISS" up is he now?!? Hopefully it will work and get him on the nice list...


Wags and Licks,
Mollie Jo & Bobo

9:53 AM  
Blogger Peanut said...

Interesting that he is smooching on mom right after you tell him that santa paws has him on the naughty list.

10:18 AM  
Blogger Scruffy, Lacie and Stanley's Place said...

Tanner...you actually referred to the esteemed Mr. Joesph Stains as...dare I say it...

FLOOR CRAPPER???

OMD...We are in shock...no, no...not cuz he stained the floor...I mean, isn't that like his job?

But becuz you had the temerity to call him that...(definition to Doofus...that means um well...as Mango would say...NARDS) (Lacie giggles thinkin' that Mumsie told her she had to give Bruvver that definition one day when he was a small child...he never asked again....)

So...Joe was kissin' Momma?? Woot...I'm tellin' ya Tanner...ya catch more flies with sugar than vinegar...you better pucker up there for Momma or your lists are gonna be very uneven.

Sincerely yours,

Laciecakes!!!!!

Gotcha with that sincerely crap, didn't I??!! XXOO

12:38 PM  
Blogger Sophie Brador said...

Tanner, I think Joey is the most adorable ever and if you knew anything about him, you would know that he is the smartest AND most loving dog on earth. And I bet he gets the best presents ever, like maybe a snuggins ball stuffed with meatable bits of some scrumptious kind that he doesn't have to share ever. Unless I come to visit.

xo
SB

12:56 PM  
Blogger The OP Pack said...

Joey is one smart pupster. We just knew he would figure out a way to get his mom to pay attention to him.

Woos, Thunder and Phantom

2:30 PM  
Blogger MJ's doghouse said...

good work Torkelson....good work...and JOe...way to suck up to the mama...

2:47 PM  
Blogger Wild Dingo said...

He's a smart one that Joe. He knows he can lick and kiss the naughty list right out of your head!
~wags-n-wiggles~
wild dingo

PeeEssWoo: my design partner has a BT that looks just like Joe. CUTE!

2:51 PM  
Blogger Pearl said...

BOL! Joey the floor pooper was totally desperate! He is really quite smart!!!

3:42 PM  
Blogger Maggie and Mitch said...

Boy oh boy! Joey is major sucking up! We're sure Santa is smiling down on him now!

Love ya lots
Maggie and Mitch

4:00 PM  
Blogger Mack and Sally Ann said...

I think Joe is a good boy. You shouldn't speak ill of him. He is just older, and sometimes older doggies like us just are tired and grumpy.
Mack

4:12 PM  
Blogger Khyra The Siberian Husky And Sometimes Her Mom said...

It was soooo the khoy paw khross!

Woo've been studying ME - I just know it!

Hugz&Khysses,
Khyra

4:13 PM  
Blogger Benny and Lily said...

Wow...caught on tape! Sucking up big time!
Benny & Lily

6:06 PM  
Blogger Teddy said...

Ha ha, Joey is trying to trick Santa this year. He's doing a good job pretending to be a cheerful doggie (hee hee)

Is pooping on the floor a big naughty? Uh-oh...

8:13 PM  
Blogger Lorenza said...

Haaaa!
This is a post to remember... forever!
If I had not seen the pictures... I would not believe it!
Kissy Joey!
Kisses and hugs
Lorenza

8:28 PM  
Blogger Asta said...

Oh My dog Tannew
Joey totally got inflooenced by youw Santa stowy, hehehe
I would absolutely tell him about giving you the snuggie ball..I think this might be youw onliest chance

Those smoochies wewe wowld class..I'm an expawt and I studied them fwom all angles..he is going to be so in wif Santa
smoochie kisses
aSTA

9:50 PM  
Blogger Bae Bae said...

Aww.. Joey sure is cute giving out kisses

~ Bae

11:48 PM  
Blogger Huskee and Hershey said...

OMdoG.. OMdoG.. is that JOE STAINS?? He looks like a real pro in giving those smoochie kisses that also doubles as 'facial massages' to your mom.. heehee..
We bet he is back on Santa's 'good' list!!

2:09 AM  
Blogger wally said...

Holy cow, Joe! You are working it. Santa will re-route the coal to Tanner and bring you bacon for sure!

wally t.

3:40 AM  
Blogger Petey said...

I'll cuddle and smile really big when she comes home, but the only time Mom gets a kiss from me is when she's got cream cheese on her finger. Mica, on the other hand, is one kissyface kitty. Mom can even put her finger by his mouth and say "kiss" and he'll give he one. Not me, no way, no how! (Doesn't stop her from covering me with kisses every day.)

Your pal,

Petey

11:41 AM  
Blogger Sunny,Scooter,Shamus&Jamie said...

hayhayhayhay tannerer!!! ok anok. so duz u finks u an mee will git pressees frum that santa dude?? we haf been reeeelee gud, rite?? ok anok. i fot i shud ax u acuz sunny sez i is sumtimz baderer i doan fink so rite???
Mom sez joee is reelee kissin up! hahahahah ok anok
godda go
ur twinnerer scooter

12:44 PM  
Blogger Murphy Dogg said...

Hey Tanner,
Joey knows what's up. You gotta give lots of slobbery kisses in order for Santa to bring the good sh*t. So you better get kissin' dude.
C-ya,
Murphy Dogg

4:50 PM  
Blogger doyle and mollie said...

woof hoo to the xmas spirit all that snoggin and girlie stuff...bring it on!

5:11 PM  
Blogger Holly and Khady said...

Looks like Joey knows how to suck up pretty well to me!!

Holly

7:53 PM  
Blogger Molly,Taffy and Monty said...

With all the effort Joe has put in we are positive Santa Paws will leave him loads of gifts.

Molly, Taffy and MOnty

4:58 PM  

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