Joe Stains

This is the blog of an angry old boston terrier. (and his little brother Tanner who gets to post every Tuesday)

Thursday, December 10, 2009


So Tanner seems to think its funny to tell everyone that I have some issues staining the floor. These are not issues, these are my expressions! I am not sick, and Mom and Dad know my M.O.

When I am mad about something I poop on the floor. I always poop in front of the TV. ALWAYS. So recently there have been a lot of things making me mad.

1. It is absolutely FREEZING here. I don't want to go outside to go to the bathroom, its too cold.

2. My uncle moved to California, I am used to having him here.

3. My TV room has been changed around.

All of this means I get mad, and I poop on the floor. The reason my Mom and Dad know that I am not sick and this is not anything more than me um expressing myself is because they can close the door to the TV room and I don't poop in the house. But my goodness people and dogs, I AM JOE STAINS. That is my name?! Anyway, if you don't believe how mad I am, take a look at this photo...

Joey is Cold and Grumpy
I am sitting NEXT to Mom that is how cold I am. Look at my face?!? Have you ever seen a dog more angry in your entire life??

So thank you for your concern, but I am not sick. Just mad.

30 Stains:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

It's strange how Joe and Tanner's personalities actually do come out in the faces.

6:30 PM  
Blogger Khyra The Siberian Husky And Sometimes Her Mom said...

Have woo asked about having a heating pad dukhted taped to your body?

BTW, 27 feels like 14 here! Woo khoming ovFUR?


6:49 PM  
Blogger Peanut said...

You do look mad.

6:54 PM  
Blogger The OP Pack said...

Sorry about the cold, Joey. We would invite you over but it is truly frigid here. Hope it warms up soon for you.

Woos, Phantom and Thunder

7:40 PM  
Blogger Lorenza said...

Hi, Joey!
I am so happy to know you are not sick... just mad!
Those are very good reasons to be mad!
Kisses and hugs

8:18 PM  
Blogger Gus said...

Hey Joey...take my advice. Go with the sick-o excuse. Up the sympathy quotient.

But I can unnerstand why you are mad.


8:31 PM  
Blogger Sophie Brador said...

Are you mad that your mom won't let you come visit me?


9:48 PM  
Blogger -The Mullin Clan's Mommy- said...

Woes & Woos,Joey - The PGH Stillers lost another one!!!

Tanner - you shoulda've gone wif the sick tummy angle not the mad one!

-da boyz, Cosmos & Juneau-

9:48 PM  
Blogger Dennis the Vizsla said...

hello joe stains its dennis the vizsla dog hay no i hav never seen a dog that angry wel eksept for tucker wen i steel his toys or wen i step on him or wen i nok him down or wen i am on mamas lap or wen i am tutching him but other then that never!!! eksept wen i dont let him steel my fud!!! ok bye

11:20 PM  
Blogger MJ's doghouse said...

good times...i knew all along that you were not sick joe...we all know when mr stains makes business...that mr stains mean business.

11:24 PM  
Blogger Maggie and Mitch said...

You do look pretty mad, Joey! Have you asked Santa for a sweater?

Love ya lots,
Maggie and Mitch

3:58 AM  
Blogger Mango said...

Gosh Joe, I would offer to have you share my bed to warm up but that would mean we would have to (ish) touch which is not suitable for he dogs such as ourselves. Guess you will need to make due with mom for now.


5:53 AM  
Blogger Mack said...

Mom says you look "precious". OMD.

And I love to poop in the house when mom's not looking. Oddly enough my favorite spot is IN FRONT OF THE TV!!

5:59 AM  
Blogger TwoSpecialWires said...

We TOTALLY understand personal expression (we just don't talk about it a lot) and we TOTALLY understand frigid cold. We are celebrating! It's to reach 40° today! Woo hoooo!

We get it.
Jake and Fergi xxoo

8:08 AM  
Blogger Fred said...

Joe, you are a master at revenge. Good job, buddy, on your expressions.

8:49 AM  
Blogger SGR said...

Woof! Hi There ... I'm Sugar. oh! oh!!!!
Just checking in if you received my ecard as part of the DWB Exchange Holiday Card ... if not it is posted on my blog. Looking forward to be blog friends.
Just want to wish you and your family Happy Holidays. I just posted my last post for the year ... we are going on a holiday break. Lots of Golden Holiday Woofs, Sugar

1:28 PM  
Blogger Scruffy, Lacie and Stanley's Place said...

OKayyyyyy...I am assuming that after last night's game you had a major butt explosion over most of your house...the BROWNS actually beat us? WTF????

The ONLY good thing about the game is the fans probably all froze to death and are still seated upright in the stands...

We are now stickin' to the Pens...

And Stanley made a hoooooooooooooge stain today, but he did it outside...

Kisses dear Joey...


Hi Tanner!!

4:51 PM  
Blogger Mack and Sally Ann said...

Dear Joe,
For a doggie who is mad, you sure look loved, and happy. Would you like to come south for a party? You can come to see the south, maybe that would make you warmer.
Sally Ann

5:30 PM  
Blogger Turbo the Sibe said...

I needed to tell you that my Human is very stupid...and lazy. She only just figured out how to add your blog to her Google Reader!

6:57 PM  
Blogger Benny and Lily said...

You do look mad. we feel for ya buddy, the things we go through!
Benny & Lily

7:24 PM  
Blogger Petra said...

Well, I feel a whole lot better now that you've straightened us out! And I'm very glad you're not sick, just mad.

7:32 PM  
Blogger Stella said...

Lighten up, Joe. You have more clothes, hoodies, sweatshirts, trench coat, jackets, than any other pup I know. Dig them out and wear them. They will warm you up!

Its not good for you to get so mad, you will wind up having a stroke or something. So take it easy, Joe and take my clothing advice.



10:25 PM  
Blogger Two Country Poodles said...

We use a heating pad cause we are always cold...and momma is always warm!

Wags and Licks,
Mollie Jo & Bobo

11:37 PM  
Blogger Ike said...

Dude, I totes get it. I pee little squirts when I'm mad. It's what we do.

12:09 AM  
Blogger The Airechicks said...


Is your Dad okay? You're giving him the biggest "STINK EYE" - we hope he wasn't hurt taking your picture.


2:48 PM  
Blogger Dewey Dewster said...

Oh Joey....Gram knows all about doggies 'n gettin' mad 'n makin'
stains......that's why we all get inta our crates when they go any stains are in there if we choose ta make 'em....

It was sure cold here the last couple days...'n it isn't even officially Winter yet....can't the Old Man read a calendar....

Does yer Mom have a Spot Bot ta take care of yer stains? Gram says that's the best thing they ever made.....

Dewey Dewster here....

6:34 PM  
Blogger Asta said...

Thank dog Joey!!!
I was wowwied,but it was stoopid of me. I should have usd my bwains and figoowed out that you awe the stainmastew and you had a good weason..Now that I know, I am welieved. Cewtainly noone can blame you fow being mad..those awe all vewy logical weasons
smoochie welieved kisses
pee ess It is weally weally fweezing hewe

11:22 PM  
Blogger wally said...


I cannot believe all these terrible, angry-making things happened to you! Do you want us to mail you some more poop for you to express yourself with?

wally t.

9:49 AM  
Anonymous Blair Sorrel said...

WHY URBAN METAL ISN'T PRECIOUS -Blair Sorrel, Founder, www.StreetZaps. com,

Of course, you want a worry-free walk year-round, so adopt this simple strategy:


Take just a few seconds to survey the immediate surroundings and make your trajectory toward a non-conductive surface, ie., plastic, wood, cardboard, rather than risking any metal or electrical fixture. The lowly, free-standing garbage bag, is you and your dog's best friend, most of the time, unless it's snowed and salted. Consider the safer, hardware-free RopeNGo leash and harness to help shield against a possible zapping and for greater peace of mind.


Your pooch's sex is irrelevant. True, the most gruesome scenario is that of a male dog electrocuted by its ricocheting urine, but contact voltage is just that, mere interaction with an energized surface. Our poster girl sidled a fire hydrant and limped for five days. Intuit your dog's cues, if resistant to an area, choose an alternative route. Elude potentially live work areas or carry your canine, if necessary. Opt for indoor products such as The Pet Loo, Hammacher Schlemmer's Indoor Restroom, or Wee-Wee Pads, if external conditions are ominous. Dog booties can leak and make your pooch even more vulnerable.


Any of these fixtures might be dangerous, so again, choose non-conductive where and when possible. (link to home page fixtures listed below and/or the visuals page):

View All Home Page & Safety Images

– Street & Traffic Lights can leak if damaged internally, even if the compartment is fully closed and the light is not illuminated

– While wooden blocks anchor Scaffolding or Sidewalk Sheds, be aware that sloppy wiring by a contractor and/or the use of lighting equipment which is NOT WATER-PROOFED or even suitable for outdoor usage, may still shock a passerby.

– ATM Vestibules

– Decorative Lighting

– Dog Booties may increase
the risk of a shock

– Electrical Boxes

– Fire Hydrants

– Fire Police Call Boxes

– Manhole Covers

– Muni Meters

– Phone Booths

– Service Boxes

– Street Light Boxes

– Traffic Boxes

– Work Areas

After all, why chance it when there's a choice?


Tampered equipment can become pernicious so please map damaged fixtures and known hot spots to admonish other pedestrians and alert the utility and transportation department.

4:17 PM  
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4:00 PM  

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